Sunday, November 7, 2010

Big Honkin' Pill of Discomfort

Life is full of things that make me uncomfortable. I can go down a list:
1) The house is too cold
2) Too many dogs in the bed and I can't find a spot
3) Being around someone that I don't like or that is really different from me
4) The chair is too hard ... or too soft
5) Aging
6) Walking by a homeless person asking for money
7) Taking a huge pill
8) My jeans are too tight
9) The audio to the movie is too loud

I have decided that my entire life is dedicated to my comfort. I love to be comfortable. I have also seen that God is NOT dedicated to my comfort ... and He honestly doesn't care if I'm comfortable or not. He loves me. He wants the best for me. But my comfort is not the highest point on His list (if it even makes His list or not!).

Just recently, I was complaining to God about a situation. To me, what I was describing to Him was something that He definitely should change -- not because of my comfort level, but because it was "right"!! He needed to intervene and make it "right". Apparently His perfect will wasn't being done in this situation, and He needed to step in and change things (according to my infinite wisdom and superiority). I spent time in prayer ... I spent time in His Word ... and then felt totally empty and alone because there didn't seem to be an answer for me. It was like God was silent, and it hurt.

As I was sitting there sniffling and feeling sorry for myself, I picked up Crazy Love, by Frances Chan. I've skimmed through the book before, but that had been about it. So, I began thumbing through it again ... and then God spoke.
Life is comfortable when you separate yourself from people who are different from you.
That epitomizes what my life was like: characterized by comfort.
But God doesn't call us to be comfortable.
He calls us to trust Him so completely that we are unafraid to put ourselves in situations
where we will be in trouble if He doesn't come through.
What? Repeat that, please? God doesn't call ME to be comfortable?! In fact, He's asking me to step out in faith and trust Him ... and in this situation, that's what He's doing.  I realized that God orchestrates the day-by-day circumstances of my life. There's never a situation too big that He can't control. But, once again, He calls me to lean on Him, to trust in Him, to place my hand in His ... and keep continuing despite my comfort. In this particular situation, I've learned that God is looking for my perseverence, and He's teaching me through each step of it. While I call out to Him to deliver me so that I can be "comfortable", He's intent on my learning a lesson regardless of my comfort level. He also assures me that other people that might be involved in this situation are not my concern -- He loves them and deals with them and He's got it under control. In other words, God doesn't need me to worry and fret and complain!!

I'd love to say that this is a lesson I've loved to "re-learn" (because I've definitely learned it before), but that wouldn't be true. It's one of those bittersweet lessons -- like a big honkin' pill that hurts on the way down, but you know it's what you need. Today, I'm thankful that God "re-teaches" me ... that He's more concerned with the end result than with my comfort. My role in this uncomfortable area is to persevere and trust in the God Who is sovereign. And God assures me that He'll be with me each step of the way as we walk through this together ...
"Be content with what you have; for God Himself has said, "I will never, never
let go of your hand; I will never never forsake you."
Hebrews 13:5a (Weymouth New Testament)

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