Thursday, November 11, 2010

Mangling Songs is my Specialty

Yes, it's true. I love listening to country music. I love the red-dirt country (which basically originated in Oklahoma, by the way), thanks to my middle son who got his whole family hooked on Cross Canadian Ragweed, Stoney Larue, or the Zac Brown Band (BEFORE they were famous). I love Carrie Underwood and Taylor Swift ... love Brad Paisley and Tim McGraw ... love Darius Rucker (formerly known as Hootie from Hootie and the Blow Fish) and Miranda Lambert. Yup, I pretty much love it all.

I have a major problem though. I find myself singing along to the songs and then adding my own twist, or changing the words around. This has been a secret, because it's really ridiculous how I mangle these songs ... but it's usually for my own enjoyment and entertainment as I drive in the car alone. But, now I'm sharing that with you. I'll share the song ... and then show you how I change it to fit me. If you're a country music fan, you'll maybe see the humor in it. If you're not, this blog will be really strange ...

   The song says: "If I die young...", Diana sings: "If I die young ... ooops! Too late!"

   The song says: "God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy." Diana sings: "God is great, beer is gross, and it makes me hazy."
   The song says: "Jesus take the wheel...", Diana sings: "Jesus, take the wheel ... and then give it back really quick because I have a good idea where we need to go."

   The song says: "I had a barbecue stain on my white t-shirt, you were killing me in that mini skirt." Diana sings it: "I had a barbecue stain on my white t-shirt, I never learned to eat right, what can it hurt?"

Okay, I never said that my mangled versions of the songs were particularly impressive or brilliant.

Country songs aren't the only ones that I'll destroy. Remember the Christmas song that goes: "...beautiful sight, we're happy tonight, walking in a winter wonderland." Diana usually sings it this way: "...beautiful sight, we're happy tonight, walking in our woolen underwear." Yup, I can't think of a reason off the top of my head why I always sing about underwear in this song, but I do. There's other songs that I've managed to put in phrases about dirty or holey underwear, but I'm sure you've heard enough mangled lyrics for the day.

The sad part is that I'm the only person who thinks it's funny. And now you know my secret and think I'm extremely strange, just like my family does. But I sure crack myself up as I'm driving along making up goofy words to popular country songs (all songs are considered fair game for me, however). Who knows? Maybe someday I'll be famous (like Weird Al Yankovic) and you can say you knew me "when." Stay tuned ...

1 comment:

  1. My husband does this ALL the time. Always makes me laugh!

    My deal is that I will answer the kids questions with a song. Let me tell you, they love that. "Mom, what time is it?" Me: "Does anybody really know what time it is? Does anybody really care? (About ti--ime.)" I know they are dying for me to stop, so I finish the chorus. :)