Thursday, March 1, 2012

I Am So Patient ... NOT!

Wes and I were talking the other day, and I made a comment about how I'm more patient than I used to be. He just smiled at me ... and said nothing, which honestly said way more than if he HAD said something. Personally, I DO think I'm better, but I've still got a long ways to go. Now that I think about it, that really hurts my feelings ... but that will be another blog.

Some examples of my notable impatience?

** I despise waiting in a check-out line. I can feel the tension literally work itself up my body and I wind up wanting to scream. I've never actually done that, but you should see me squirm and move around in a check-out line. My husband tells me that I act like I'm in pain.  (Now that I've admitted that to anyone other than my husband, I feel pretty bad about my impatience meter.)

** If I buy an anti-wrinkle cream, I expect to look 10 years younger the first time I try it. I don't want to have to wait for six weeks or however long the product advertises. Give me instant results!

** Diet and exercise takes way too long for me. The first day that I eat right and cut my portions back or if I start a work-out routine, I expect to get in to all of my skinny clothes and have people comment how tiny I've become. Besides, sweating is just icky anyway.

** I don't particularly care for fast food. I'd prefer sitting in a restaurant, but I'd also prefer that they serve it in "fast-food" time. I might be impatient, but I'm never mean to my server for waiting too long though. Impatient and mean are two different things, right? But if that food gets there really fast, I'd like to kiss that cute little ole' server right on the cheek IF they didn't arrest me for being a wacky weirdo.

** And do NOT get me started on traffic jams ... or waiting rooms. It will just be too painful for all of us.

So, yes, I haven't been particularly gifted with being patient. It's something I've had to learn (and obviously am learning very slowly according to my husband) through many repeated events throughout my life. I've had four children, for Pete's sake! Surely THAT should count as something for me on the patience scale!! I've housebroken puppies ... I've had student drivers ... I've waited for repairmen to show up -- all without hurting anyone or breaking any laws. So, I'd like to think I've made a little bit of progress.

So, it just goes to figure that the main ministry of my life right now is what would be considered a "sowing" ministry. You know the one -- the type where you spend a lot of time sowing seeds but you don't happen to see much fruit or growth. Yeah, that kind. The kind of ministry for an incredibly patient person. (Let me state clearly though, it's not the people that I get impatient with. It's all of the millions of details and the organization that gets to me.) Of course, we already mentioned our four children. That's the area where the patience-learning first began. The funny thing? The areas of my life that bring me some of the greatest joy are in my "sowing" ministry and in the lives of my children. Yet those are areas that require the most amount of patience -- an area which I'm sorely lacking.

Obviously, God is working and granting me the patience when I need it. He points out that I might never see the fruit. He points out that not all of the seed might grow to fruition. But He also promises that some definitely will. His Word absolutely never returns to Him void, so I'm to continue with this business of seed sowing. God is the One Who provides the growth. God is the One Who will decide when the harvest is ready. All He asks me to do is to faithfully sow His seed ... to patiently sow His seed ... to continuously sow His seed. As I plod along with the sowing, He brings me great joy because someday, somehow, somewhere ... it will all be worth it. Even an impatient heart like mine can recognize that.

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